All I wanted was to paint my pain
With forced brush strokes across
A gleaming canvas.
To let it sparkle like
The sinister Cheshire Cat grin,
With teeth short and blunt.
Nothing like my own
Sharp canines
That rip and tear,
Salacious shreds fluttering from
My gaping maw.
I would use thick oil paints,
Stacking them layer by layer
So you’d have to dig away
To get to the vulnerable truth.
All I wanted was for someone
To see my artistry and understand.
Past the pretentious philandering,
Past the obnoxious pleas
Of obvious words that read too loud,
Too blatant, too bold.
Subtlety was never my specialty.
It’s passivity or aggression.
I hid for so long,
A lost child – never made it
Out of the blanket fort.
I opted for false comfort
In the company of feathers and cotton,
Soft fabrics that could cradle my head
And soak up hot tears
That leaked endlessly from
Sunken eyes.
Now I’m all grown up,
Or, I have grown
My anxieties and frustrations.
They are adult sized
In this kid fortress of my brain.
Now it’s time to let them out,
The pent up problems
Of a first world child
Who misunderstood the world.
Because being taught morality
Is not the same as living it.
Well written – very powerful xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very powerful my friend. Thank you for sharing. Adulthood isn’t always all it’s meant to be, is it? But we make the most of it. Hugs.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow…
LikeLiked by 1 person
It was already good, and then your ending — SMACK!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks =)
LikeLike